My December Holidays

Well, i have back to my hometown, Taiping at december 3th. This time a bit different because i went back by bus, not kongfai's sister's car. So i have to travel by taxi to wangsa maju lrt station, and then sit lrt to masjid jamek, after that sit KTM from there until plaza rakyat, and walked a distance until i reached pudu rakyat, a place which is the main station of bus in kuala lumpur. Quite a long time i didnt exercise my hands and legs, so when i carried my bags for 1 hr, my hands cramp when overnight. LOL, shameful for a boy or man. I reached home and the first things i ever heard from my dad is :"Can u work tmr?" YES! Expected question. Of coz i said yes, cuz i need money also.

The next day i work, same procedures and same friends at there, never change. Maybe this is the life of a person who work. Remain all the same for ur whole life. If u dun have the right attitude, u sure died half way. Bored die u. The first day my friends called me go out "yam cha". At first i said ok cuz quite a long time i didnt met with them. But after i fetch my sister back from her work, i found myself is so tired and i finally rejected the "yamcha" gathering. In the end, they called me "Desmond airline" which mean i put aeroplane(cheating).

For the next day, i went to clinic and checked my legs, well the doctor said it very serious and need to burn the virus. So as usual,(i have been there before so have experience) he inject the paralyse medicine into my legs, well it hurts but just for 3 or 4 sc...and then he start use a electric fire plug to burn the virus at my legs, it become a small hole, or big hole i also duno, cuz its all red flesh now, left no skin. LOL...sound very geli.

When i walked the blood keep squeeze out, but not really pain for me. Just when see the blood coming out it mean i am hurting it. So i seldom walked. I still go to pasar and helped my father to sell, just i didnt move those heavy stuff around, to prevent further injury. God Bless Me.

Tomorrow i have to go clinic again to wash the wound, so that it will be clean and wont grow next time. Hopefully this time will fully recover. O yeah, her and me have recover our relationship, well i have known what the problem we have, its all because of me, that why she will so blur at that situation, maybe i acted too cold or looked like not care at all. BUT I DIDNT! I do really care. Just sometime hard to express it out. I am very happy she is back... I love her always.

This saturday i will going down her place and find her again as she is still studying now. Not like me having holidays. But the plan is am i going to find her to penang or i want to bring her to taiping, my mum seem dunwan me to bring her come taiping cuz it seem tired. Well, i go there only need 30 mins...i shall think about it myself then. Anyway, it sure will be a dating this saturday ...^^happy

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Dissapear

These few days were very down, moody and felt lonely. We quarreled, and she said we are in a very unstable condition. Again and again, finally, she said, dunwan ad... i was totally blank at that time..i try to tell myself, its just a joke, but it cant be in this situations. Its totally gone now. I trying my best to persuade her, i want her back...she just simply sms me and said no more ad...i try to drag our relationship for one more day, and she just keep said she is tired, what can i do? I cant force her anymore...the whole morning and afternoon i was thinking, what am I suppose to do...then i have come to a decision, if she really dunwan ad...even if u drag her back, it wont be a good thing anymore, it just become a burden. Yeah, i am thinking like this, and i decided to ask her one more question, the reason why she wan to break, if the reason is the place we stay, i wont allowed her to go. However, surprisingly, she answered me, i wan to fly, i wan freedom. Is this a good reason enuff for me? i asked myself. Yes it is. I have force her too much, its time to let go then.

I told myself, i wouldnt let a person who i love to go just like that, i want her back, surely do. But how? Until now i am still strengthless, i cant even go near her when she need me. I have to wait, wait for another 3 years until i go for work. Many people will not believe me or have faith in me, but i will wait, until i have the chance.

We break, but we still got communicate. She seem so happy, got problems still talk to me but not the others. I am greatful that she still so take care of me. She always push me to the others gals, haha..i didnt blame her, but i would rather choose her, why am i suppose to give others chance as myself haven giving myself a single chance to be with u again. The things i can give is limited, if she really find someone who can giv her in these few years, then i shall quit, silently, if not, i will want her back come to my side again. As "I love you".

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My feelings

This few weeks, i really in a blur situation, everyday repeat the same topic, same style, same life...waiting someone to open a topic for me to start of, in the end, she only said if you have nothing to say about please just close the phone and sleep. Hahaha, it was so criticism...i phoned and i was asked to close phone just because i have no topic, 2 people brains, one squeeze until the brain dry also cant find a nice one so waiting for another who have fresh mind to start it. I duno the reason...because of tired so that you dunwan to begin to think about it? In the end, once and once again, our chat never last for 30 mins, even her birthday, she spend whole day with her friends just without me, you can forget about me just like that.

I know the place we stay is far, somehow i try my best to make some topic everyday so that we can chat. You always said u are tired, but whenever i called you i can heard that you chat with ur friends with amazing energy, and chat with me like a died person. Isit so suffering? I asked you something about ur life, u said if i know it it also wont change anything, dun u refuse to answer me just a simply question, so funny isit? If u find that u are lazy to communicate anymore why dun u just speak it out? I called u and asked u why u become like that, u said u didnt. But ur action ad tell me so? I am in a blur situation. Well, u said u are tired, u just sms me one second before, then i quickly call u last night, u didnt answer my phone, today morning u told me that u fall asleep? WTF!? U can sms right away one second u fall asleep!? DUN CHEAT ME LIKE A STUPID KID!!!!

U always said i think too much? Well i dun really think so, see ur style of typing message to me at now compare to last time, i laughed at myself. My existent for you means nothing isit? I asked u so many things and so many questions, what respond u give me? " 随便你怎么认为~“ that mean u dun even care about it right? U dun care what i feel and u dun care me got find u or not...finally now i realise it... IF U THINK U ARE SO BORED OF BEING WITH ME WHY DUN WE JUST END IT!!!!!!!!!! DAMN IT!

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My Holidays In 3 Weeks

At first, i plan to have 3 months holidays in my hometown. However, my father did not agree to let me do so. His suggestion is i should continue my study whatever the University gave me, even though its a few subjects only, i should continue because soon or later i do not need to pack all stuffs together and struggle to the end. He has the point that make my mind clear, so i decided to go back KL after 3 weeks holidays.

During this 3 weeks, i am very very lazy, i refused to go out and work rather stay at home. Early morning wake up, i brushed my tooth and face then sit in front of the ladtop for a whole day. Because of these reactions, my mother, my father and my family, very angry about me. So they decided to force me to work. Work as what? Of coz is my family business which need some workers but my father refused to hire which burden the cost of payment. I would like to help my dad of coz, however, i just dun like the style of selling fruits.

Early morning 400am, i have to struggle my mind to wake up and become clear after bathed. Then walked to old house which is opposite of me, help my uncle and father to move hundred boxes of fruits from the refrigerator to the small lorry we have. Well i manage to skip this one because i bathed too long time and my uncle had already done with it. We will reached market at around 530am, then we start to move down the fruits from the lorry and parked them nicely at our stall place. Usually is Uncle Yong and my uncle do the moving stuff, my father and I take care of the setting of stalls, like take the chairs out, clean the fruits which we never keep back to home, this is to ensure we save our time. But some of the fruits really need to keep inside the refrigerator if not it will spoiled very easily.

After we placed all the fruits and things nicely in our stall, its been already 700am, so its time for breakfast, usually i let my uncle himself go eat first because he do alot of moving stuff which cost a lot of energy, that why he always easily get hungry. Me and my father will go to the second floor to have our breakfast at around 900am. At that time, he will spend some time to wash my brain and talked about my bad things, try make me to change my immature attitude. I have kept that in my mind.

We sell our fruits until 1200pm, then only we start to pack all our stuffs and prepared back home. Back to home we need to eat our lunch first then only we will go to old house which only opposite of us, and take down all the boxes of fruits at the lorry and move them into the refrigerator. I complained a lot for this work because i hate i have to wake up 400am so early and end my work at 400pm. Then i spend 3 hours sleeping in my bed, then have dinner with my family. After that, i left only 2 hours for my favourite. My friends holidays so fun and happy, and i have to do this things.

My mind kept think about the unfairness until my dear, she told me the reason and good things about it. Well, she has the points, and it make me clear that, what am i doing is just mean nothing compare to my father 365 days work continuously to earn some money and pay me my study fees. "People learn to complain more than they learn to appreciate". This is what i learned in it. Thank you, father, mother, and darling who always take care of my feelings.

One of the saturday, i went down to her place and date her. Well, she is becoming more and more pretty, i am proud of her. We went for shopping, eating and watched cinema, hmm, dear is a wonderful girl friend for me, sometime i felt abit regret....
Because, she want buy a pair of shoes, but in the end, she did not actually find one, as she said it is too expensive, and dunwan waste my money, even a pencil box, she also dun allowed me to pay for her. I know you are taking care of me, but i would be happy if dear allowed me to spend some little cheap but meaningful things for you. Maybe now i cannot buy a RM 200 shoes for you, but i will learn how to keep money and buy for you in future. Dear had let me see a pair of ring, a boy and a gal, she asked me to choose one, i choose the gal one, and she kept the boy one, now i have put the ring at my pencil box, which everytime i open it also can see her.

Now i ad at KL, which mean quite a period of time we cannot meet each other, as she also have school, i guess i have to wait and be patience until we can meet again. Miss you.....

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Exam finished

After 3 weeks, my final exam have finished. Chemical engineering, an amazing course i have choose to study. The amazing i wrote there suppose to be curse subject. Regret of choosing? Not really.. Somehow just did not do well. The first subject fluid mechanics, interestingly the students have the "solution book" rule the world. Well, i didnt bought it, because i will never think that UTAR "standard" is so high. If i can get a C, i would be very very damn lucky already. Others subjects except the english and mathematics, all i can said:"Terrible!"

Actually i am planning to have short sem after this semester. I have registered 4 subjects. However, yesterday i found out that UTAR only offer me 2 subjects. They cancel 2 of them. Kong fai, he plan not to take the short semester and having 3 months holidays soon. For me, i think that if i study first, then i will be easier for the future. I went ask my mum opinions, she said abit waste of time, just 2 subjects, need 7 weeks and more stay there, one week only study 2 days, which each days only 2 hour. Not worth it. Hmmm, maybe i should consider that. I will process my decision after i go to find her after i back to taiping.

Thinking of my recent situation, my friends, quite a number of them are quitting of their recent course, reason is cannot handle, cannot cope with it. Fall down..... Shall i do the same thing with them? I am not very sure of it...Maybe i shall wait for the result to come out first? If i failed anyone of it, i shall quit then.

This 3 months holidays, what am i suppose to do? what am i suppose to think? what am i suppose to plan? I haven have a final decision of it. But mostly, working is a must for me. Its a chance to pay back my parents maybe? After going home shall be discuss with my father and mum.

Recently play a game, called dragonica. Kinda cute i can said. And kinda terrible, because i ad fall in it. = (
Sometime during exam, i am so bad mood or can said mad, exam time still can play game. Awwww....weird...but really cant put myself into the mood of study. Its all over now, final also finished already, what can i do? I think only waiting the judges to settle the case now.

*The picture i posted is the game called dragonica. The golden color character is me.
Hiyuu:"Hi, nice to meet you."

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